Thoughts on Marriage

RT @johnpiper Marriages fail because of how right it feels to justify sinful responses to sin.

Hm. Just because one of you fails, doesn’t mean the other one has the right to ‘punish’ or ‘give him/her what they deserve.’ Show some patience, show some grace, show some forgiveness… even if (especially when) your partner doesn’t deserve it. Is that hard? uhhh yea. But, it becomes a little easier when you think about the Perfect Love and Grace that we are shown every day, when clearly, we don’t deserve it.

New Farmer’s Market in Fisher Park

http://www.news-record.com/content/2009/11/19/article/farm_market_opens_downtown

This is so awesome! I love Fisher Park even more now…

ohhh you dont know

Aw man, was checking out a little Halloween action from the boys today:

Hard to describe the feeling… but man oh man do I miss this. When did things get so complicated?

I’ve had to miss the last couple rounds because of family obligations, and I’ll be missing them in Charleston in a couple weeks too… Growin’ up, all that. hey.

slooooow down

Well, hit a snag this week.  As you know, there’s nothing like a super-close relationship to uncover some not-so-pretty things about yourself.  Anyway, I hope I’ll be in your (whoever you are…) thoughts and prayers as I work through some things. 

I think I’ve cracked the shell, but now need to submit those things.  I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.  Knowing the difference between right and wrong, remitting sins, strength of character.. those things are all there to learn and follow, if we choose.

On a brighter note, I am so very happy and super excited about making this cake for my fiance’s 30th birthday!

http://www.foodandwine.com/recipes/malt-ball-cake

To Love is Not to Possess–James Kavanaugh

To love is not to possess,

To own or imprison,

Nor to lose one’s self in another.

Love is to join and separate,

To walk alone and together,

To find a laughing freedom

That lonely isolation does not permit.

It is finally to be able

To be who we really are

No longer clinging in childish dependency

Nor docilely living separate lives in silence,

It is to be perfectly one’s self

And perfectly joined in permanent commitment

To another–and to one’s inner self.

Love only endures when it moves like waves,

Receding and returning gently or passionately,

Or moving lovingly like the tide

In the moon’s own predictable harmony,

 Because finally, despite a child’s scars

Or an adult’s deepest wounds,

They are openly free to be

Who they really are–and always secretly were,

In the very core of their being

Where true and lasting love can alone abide.

On Love

The bottom line is that (a) people are never perfect, but love can be, (b) that is the one and only way that the mediocre and vile can be transformed, and (c) doing that makes it that. We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.

Tom Robbins:
Still Life With Woodpecker

Friday, November 6th, 2009

Gerald showed up at my house about 7 p.m. looking very handsome in a nice striped sweater.  I was wearing my black boatneck dress, since we were going to a nice dinner. 

It was chilly outside, but not windy.  The leaves had turned about 2 weeks before, but were still pretty on the ground.  We rode in the Subaru and talked about our day at work.

Mellow Mushroom was too crowded, so we headed down to Recreation Billiards and had a Hobgoblin and a Sweetwater 420… laughed, talked to this and that person at the bar.

Gerald wants to stop by a cocktail party sponsored by his work on top of the Nissen building.  I was pretty impressed when he pulled out a magnetic door pass to get into the building.  My heels are clicking across the marble floor, and as we got into the elevator I said,.. “Wow, I haven’t been here since our first date.” (When we went to a hip-hop show on top of the roof in July 2008.)

We get to the rooftop, and no one is there… I’m thinking, maybe the party hasn’t started yet.  Gerald suggests we go look at the lights.  It’s so pretty at night…

We  chatted for a few minutes, and Gerald told me he had something to ask me… to marry him!

Agh!!!!!!!!!! I’m so so so excited, I cried, of course.  Actually, I’m the worst about crying ever, so I cried for about 10 minutes.  Next, Gerald goes to get one of the “Bombshell Brews” that we had brewed together last year. He had hidden it on the roof with a cute explanation note.  So we drank the beer and took a few pictures.

The ring is absolutely gorgeous… The stone is over 1 carat and was from a necklace that his grandfather had given to his grandmother.  It’s so huge and shiny! He had it set in a 14k white gold 6-prong setting that is gorgeous.  (It was a little too big, since I have tiny fingers, but we had it sized the next morning.)

So, I call a few important people in my life to tell them, then we’re off to a romantic dinner at the nicest steak house in Winston.  The dinner was lovely, everything was soooooo perfect and romantic and fairy tale.

The next morning I made a lovely and yummy breakfast… Maple sausage, wheat bread with blueberry toast, scrambled eggs with onions, peppers, and carrots, and a sliced pear.  We went and had the ring sized that morning and also got my nails painted.  Gerald also got his first pedicure, which was just so darn cute, haha. (He kept saying, that now he can be as gay as he wants, since he’s engaged and all. hahahaha)

Along the way, I called all my friends and family, which was just so much fun!

Next, we’re off to a 1-year old birthday party for Gerald’s niece. I got to show my ring off to everyone and just be so dang happy!!

The weekend was just so romantic and perfect! (Except when the Panthers lost.)

I’m so freakin happy and just lucky to have found the man of my dreams, and I’m just so excited that I get to see him and talk to him and watch him and be with him everyday for the rest of my life! It’s just overwhelming…

Yay

Your “online” life

So, I finally did it, deleted the ol’ myspace.  That thing was waaaaay outdated and I was not interested in reading 33 ‘unread’ messages.  Anyway, it felt good to get rid of that.  I’d like to get rid of my old yahoo account too, now that I’ve upgraded to gmail (so much better)… But I’m going to wait a bit on that one.  Just because, I’ve given out a lot of resumes with that email attached. So, you never know.

I also like to do a facebook friends clean-up every once in a while, to get rid of people who I don’t really know, and don’t really care about.  I mean, that’s a lot of private info they can see!  All in all, (I’ve been feeling like this for a while), Facebook bugs me.  I really just wish it would go away.

My boyfriend, who is a great guy and whom I love very much… has a billion facebook friends, blog and twitter followers, and all those thingies.  He’s really into it and pretty much updates everything all the time.  I have no idea who all those people are, and sometimes I feel like he has this whole separate life that I’m not a part of.  It’s weird.  That’s just another reason why I sometimes wish it would just all go away.

I do like blogs, however! I like reading other people’s writing and knowing what you’re thinking about.  So, I’ve been happy to see several of my friends start blogs lately.

Other than that, I guess I’m just wondering how people handle this new aspect of relationships?  Is it like, off-limits, this is my private online life and you don’t need to know about it? Is it like, giving an update on how was your day at work? (How was your facebooking, twittering, etc?) Haha, well, it sounds dumb. (*It’s only a website.*) But, it’s not really all that dumb, if you’re spending a lot of time on these ‘things.’

On another note, a friend of mine recently got engaged, and didn’t call me. (Didn’t you see it on facebook?) Well, yea, but, I thought you would call me!

Things like that.

Anyway, it’s here, and I don’t see it going away anytime soon… So, I guess I just have to figure out how to deal with it!

Creative Thinking

I thought this was a neat article…

http://www.copyblogger.com/mental-blocks-creative-thinking/

“You create your own imaginary boxes simply by living life and accepting certain things as “real” when they are just as illusory as the beliefs of a paranoid delusional.”

Get Clean No. 7 from Republic of Teas

This is the new tea I’ve been drinking this week.  It’s a red tea with rooibos, milk thistle, indian sarsparilla, dandelion root, chicory root, burdock root, and red clover.  It’s a pretty good blend of good, cleansing stuff and tastes alright too!

This is mainly in response to some problems I’ve been having with my skin.  I’m not sure at this point if it’s stress or diet or what… but it’s been acting up.  I’ll probably make an appointment with either a dermatologist or Greensboro Naturopathy for next week.  My mom is insistent that I see a real doctor, but I’m feeling like I’d rather treat from within than getting a prescription or some stupid expensive topical ointment. We’ll see…